men and mice have nothing in common.

okay so i want to formally apoligize for my last blog it sucked..but i am really confused lately mostly with myself and trying to please the people around me its driving me mad (i guess you could tell hehe)
so anyways...we had this book in j10...and well it sucked i hate it...i dont read books like this....(sorry about all the dots...) and we have to write a review about it..we have to find a good piont of view for it to. the books about a mental guy and a normal guy that takes care of him. the mental guy kills this girl and the normal guy kills him its set in western time (ishhh). i so dont want to write this review but i need an a in this class...im not going to get it and then im not going to get a scholarship and then i wont go to college blah this class sucks sooo much
--sorry about these blogs im in a really bad mood..i should have done these a diff. day

dont read this you will undeniably be disgusteed by..mmeee

ergggg.!! thats what i feel like doing just screaming that like a old hominad or something of that nature...all b/c of high school drama...im falling back into old patterns which is fine but when im around certain people my personality changes and i dont want it tooo i wanna be 100% au' natural all the time...reminder to self do what you need, do what you want, do what you think is right, be you, only laugh when you think something is funny, listen to good music feel just enough pain, and good forbid dont believe anything that seems too insane/good/bad to be true. sorry i cant really include actuall information b/c im so confuzzled i want to rip up my notebook uuuurrrgggg
--so insane im going barbaric......blllllllllllllaaaaaaggger

wASTe oF TimE

IM NOT SURE I NEED TO DO ANOTHER BLOG FOR THIS WEEK(though i have more than my other classmates b/c i think their fun) SO JUST IN CASE..I HOPE I GET AN A IN J10 CLASS B/C I WANT TO GET SCHOARSHIPS TO BE A NEORSURGEON!!

Kill me romantically

sooooooo im pretty much dieing of boredem..seriously....i havent done anything since thursday night... your probably like wow weirdo cant go 3 days of no activity..then i guess your right. To be honest i absolutly loath being by myself (yeah im one of the girls that cant even go to the b-room alone, and is quite clingy)and at my house and ive been pretty much trapped here with just my direct household memebers...all because of snow. Its filled up my driveway and my parents dont want to go anywhere and dont want people to have to drive out to my house uggg im so out of ideas of what to do i just sit on my but all day stealing (oh please dont tell the cops) music and watching videos aka=wasting time.. haha and their are dramas in my life (damnit again..boys) and that doesnt even seem to fill up my days. I'll just put it this way..they can't seem to want you unless there are 2 others wanting you too but it shall be fun possibly :). If you got ideas to do something let me know..or better yet just come kidnap me!
-im lossing my sense of personality as well its frying with no interaction..i wonder if thats another symptom of crazyness..i think it is!!

I know I may look helpful but im not. Maybe i should sneer/grimmace more often.

I have mentioned before in one of my derailed blogs that im mean. Well lately (actually about 5 years) i have been trying to change that. I'd been sick of people talking about how much of a jerk i am behind my back. But anyways im having problems with doing this lately. so im going to vent on this blog. Backstory: Friend has crush on friend, she tells him and shit theres pretty much nothing you can do at this point other than see if he feels the same so i push them along to think about dating and she completly second quesses it, but thats not the bad part, shes mad at me now. Im just like if you didnt want my help you could have told me, not ask me "what should i do jasmine?!"..ugh and im just thinking you shouldnt have told him if its such a big deal. People just need to relize i barely understand whats going on with me (brink of insane isylum remember?) and then helping them...if you want to ask help or advice go ahead just dont tell me i messed it up or get mad b/c i do exactally what you were hoping for...grrr.
Another puncher in my life lately (damnit) is a boy. He's all cocky and im just like WHAT DO YOU WANT?! hes all like im your edward (like in twilight) and im thinking no your not you dumped me, edward loves...(btw im in love w/taylor laurent! <3)..bella!! make up your mind before i have to slap some sense in you darling
People want to stress me out a little more just to make me go insane. I'm some doctors experiment on crazy people i just know it! (sorry worth i ocassionally swear but i dont every other word and you will never hear me say anything vulgar in class)

Filling the space

i dont have enough time to blog today or frankly this week. I will post again soon i promise
<3 your trying to maintain a 3.900 grade average-psycho

Confidence is it all that counts?

I have always been willing to do differnt things b/c unlike many teenagers i don't want to be popular i dont even know who really fits that defintion at my school haha i just like to do the things that make me happy no drama. And that usually equals i like being friends with boys and then girls freak out on me, but anyways back to the subject.so i havent needed confidence for that but other things i never knew i needed or had confidence to do..reason i am relizing this now..im lossing confidence!! EEk i dont want to but lately i have been slightly agitated by the way i look and the way act...even though this is me. Im kinda known for crazy things and i have mellowed down alot this is probably b/c im getting older and maturing but goodness im only 15 i dont want to grow up i wanna break rules and be giddy from stupid jokes(or boys haha). Another thing, i changed myself over the summer so i would be pretter through medication(not saying b/c im not advising people do it) and it worked wonderfully i was getting tons of attention and i loved it until all of a sudden my "problem" started coming back and now i am way worse b/c i know what its like to look in the mirror and not want to break it. i was at the best point in my life for 2 months and its falling before me im worried im going to need help. when you talk to me you might notice i have some obvious problems but this is making me so much worse im sick of myself, and my face, my body,my personality, the way i am, my lifestyle, my hair, everday i get up and go hey i hate you so confidence=gone. I mean i went through alot of hard things for that medication and it messed me up for aparently no reason and peers dont make fun of me only 2 people knew about it (other than my parents) and this shit messed me up, so much that for 5 months i was miserable just to feel on top of the world for 2 months and i would keep doing this to myself. for years. tomarrow i go back to the doctor i got it from, probably to redo the whole process.
sometimes i just want to slap myself(why dont you do it?next time you see me do it!)
-maybe you should think about turning me into the syc-ward yourself..<3 your quickly becoming desperate teenager

Poems may be cheesey but cheese is good

Mmkay so i wrote these over the last 6 months most have no meaning,except the last one and dont make fun of me writing poems is semi-difficult. And if you started reading my blogs starting with this one. stop! go to the next one, actually the one after that is better i think.. i usually dont write like this haha

Gone

The Pain oh it burns
Burns and singes at a heart so cold
The Heart knew he was gone
It knew he could not come back.
It knew she didn't want it back. No
No matter how many tears stained her cheeks
A heart burning with the memories of the past and feeling its own beat
He said he'd always be there through the great and Terrible
But the heart knows now these were lies covered by a soft touch
That he wouldn't couldn't love her enough to follow though
She hoped his heart burned its own new pain
A heart that pained with regret and lies should be his pain
Oh he knows and it saddens him
But he is gone and nothing can change that
Oh the burn it pained


The Mother

We disgrace her beauty
She gives us gifts and we toss them back to her
She shows us the most beautiful things the human eye can grace
But we see them as useless we let them die and be destroyed
She tries to help us and forgives us over and over again letting us try anew
Oh but we rebel like a young child reasonless we ignore her
We fight against her as we would our own birth mothers
But the mother she grows old she can't do this too much longer
She wonders if she should tell us her secrets and give us her trust
But she knows she must soon her age is starting to show like a great ripple effecting the face of her
She's starting to surrender she's given us the tools she's given the warning signs
Now it's our turn can we help old Mother Nature? Or will we selfishly thrust the door shut on her?
STOP GLOBAL WARMING
Rage
Guess my name
I pulse, I ruin, I show
I grow upon you till you can take it no more
You can't stop me it’s a human trait
I tear the ones you love most away
I can pull and tug you from their gripping hearts
And still you will be convince it's your fault
You could have controlled me, beat me away
I come to visit you at the worst of times
You can feel me gain power, your aware I'm there
Many's bloods are in these hands of mine
I stain your past and your life too.
I can make someone toss away all they know and work for in a minute
I am powerful yes but I can be weakened but my foes of, great understanding, unbelievable forgiveness, trust, onward hope, and of course that of undying love
Guess my name…

Teacher
You take one look you can tell
The girl she smiles back at you
She doesn’t hid herself or be ashamed
She has accepted she's sick
The doctors and adults say she's so brave and strong
As the illness spreads in her body thinning her
But the mind and the soul they are healthy they are pure
Her optimism is great, it may be slim but she knows there is a chance
But she has felt Jesus's hand grace her before
Either way she knows it is not bad
She will miss those with whom she loves and care for those she was yet to meet
She trusts in god some people try so hard for this but will never understand
And the girl will hope and this will cheer her
Hope more than her worried mother
She knows that hope can bring disappointment and devastation also
She is a teacher to all of the healthy to live not for them but for life itself

Tell me
Everyone thinks they know my future
From all who are the wise ones we call adults
You'll be tall and as pretty as your mother
Your smart and you'll have a great career
Your just like your sister, she's a great girl
Your parents are funny I bet you are too
Yeah it's nice to know I'm like my family but I'm not really
I'm me and those of my friends know that’s all I'll ever be
To change me is to add a little indent those who think they can mold me are just foolish
I already know what I want
I have dreams
I'm going to follow my destiny so please don't tell me what I will do
Because I soak it up and I don’t want you to be wrong
Just don't tell me

Your starting to get into my brain now dont cha think...well nope :D-jjjajsjajsja

HOT jalopino (yes i know i spelt that wrong but u understood it) HEAD

Yes thats right add it to my list of flaws I have a very high temper and it flares for no reson really i just get irritaded.Goodness Bless my friends and families hearts for putting up with my attacks at them the only way i can see them(the attacks) to any beifit for them it to learn to handle with us pulsating necks types. Oh there is someone reading this going i wonder what made her this way a nipicky mother an abusive grandmother, nope no way in hell is it that. Its just the way im wired (i will tell you again im a bloody lunatic) but unless you can say it was caused by a rude brother or my young obsession with leaves then its just the perfect combination of being blunt and being easliy enjoyed by the fact of freaking out. And trust me that sounds really messed up i know but when i get angry enough to just flip out on someone i can put up a huge ordeal. My anger as im sure you can understand washes over me hytens(spelling error) my senses my combacks are harse but just roll off my tongue not giving a care until its burns with guilt later. But dang its weird but its kinda gives me a rush like a $10,000 paycheck to a shop-fanic or a dewy hot new guy to the romantic obbesive girl anger is my drug . Got any ideas for a career that constantly fighting (mmm lawer how fun). Though i have lost friends and lovers over my drug, hey theres billions of people i can always get more

Your bitchy (sry worth it just fits) Blogger mwhahahaha

My Baby

I think i may have a car for when i turn 16, but not any car, a truck!!! i always wanted a ford ranger for my 16th but its alright this is just a truck (ford) with an extended cab. I got to drive it around yesterday and today. I may sound like a tom-boy or a redneck but i dont even care i love it my own little (biggish) truck i just hope i do get it :S
Sincerely your procrastating math and feature story writer...

I wish my life had a beautiful storyline or at least would make a good movie

I'm young, even to young to drive without a parent but at the same time im old enough to get a job and have my own life, a life made of cerfews and choices, mainly what i do with them. Now is the time all the drama happens or not at all the cliches and rule breaking is going this is a little preview of our future. The jerk that broke your heart will quickly become immature, the pretty girls wear to much makup and turn naughty falling down their own ladders, the nerdy boys start to look like men and kinda hot, the ones that dont fit in develop completly differnt then the rest, the smarty pants strive to stay there, the quiet start shouting and the loud hush, the ones that were on the edge turn into what there mothers wouldnt want in a son, lies, hores, sellouts, backstabbing, love, tears, smiles, let downs, friends, drugs, and of course the social scenes. The habits we start now begin to shape the adults we become and the lifes we will lead. I want to live it up i wont be able to be this free and innocent later on in life lets just hope i dont tear my pulling threads to burst maybe just fray them and loosen them up
Sincerly your mentally nuts blogger

Dying To Sleep

So you know how everyone says you die if you die in your sleep. Well i have a question for them, how would you know? did you mamma tell you, well who would tell her? because to really know you would have to be dead! But i know because last night i did die in my sleep! I was kidnapped by the mafia and in this big white suburban neighboorhood house (it really seemed normal on the outside and quite exqisite on the inside the expensive clean furniture and the perfectly lined family pictures.) but you know i was trapped in it there was bodyguards scattered all around and completely around the house every way in. But yet i was completely and totally alone my imagination choking my hopes. The men had told me i was going to die because i knew something i couldnt tell anyone but i honestly had know idea what secert this supposfully was. and i promised over and over i didnt know anything! Then they told my dad to stop by the house (i was guessing that it was for money like a randsome) but i knew they would kill me anyways yet there was nothing i could do my innocent father would come up with millions if he had to, to save his little girl. So my father ended up in this building to the whole time i was bawling and sreaming not even feeling it because i was so numb but then my dad came and it all changed i was on a mission to get him out, and you know how dreams are hazzy this was my hazzy moment (dang right b/c that would have helped me get out of that damn place) but i was very glad i got him out then i was comptemplating the idea of death i am religous but to believe i could die to realize i was going to die at any moment gave me the urge to get out to find some way to escape it to not even try was obsurud and the men that were watching me were louging and just sitting around the house waiting for the head of whatever they were to come back. I got to the garage i had made it! They i opened the garage door with my hands partway and i saw the sun i thought i would never seen it again! Now i was standing, the men had noticed and threw me up before i could even flinch.. i was dead meat now the man was home i was in the basement he shot me..abruppt ending i was dead i saw the bullet hit my chest and i woke up to see my bed..i had just died in my sleep im still freaking out a bit what if im not even alive right now this is all a dream, then you wont ever read it, but what if its experiment from the mafia
-Your possibly insane blogger.......

Drowning

I am suffocating, i know your thinking she can possibly she is typing this but i feel like i am. Im so busy its driving me to procasternation beyond the norm. Its so tough to prioratize then there is the fact that im way to lazy! With trying to balance family friends (and the fact boys are dirty lol) happiness and irritation. Then there is fun and school plus the fact having to choose between them because there is not enough time to do both. (plus this huge project for j10 thats driving me crazy b/c i barely like journalism and having to write my own er...) then im pretty much a music go-roo and fashion tryer haha thats sounds stupid. Anyways then you have the friends that getting fricken straight A's are in 3 sports are beautiful with matching outfits everyday and help children in africa it makes me look like a idiot, fatso, ugly, scrub, and an uncaring B. sometimes i want to freak out and tell the teachers to leave the homework due till friday ugh or tell my friends "hey can you just get an A- and 2 B's thanks oh and when your at it, stain your clothes like a normal person and cut your hair really ugly, i almost forgot thanks girlfriend love ya." :D haha im kinda a mean person but im a little jealous haha
Love you wishing time stopper but you know i would stop it and watse it anyways (lol) blogger ;P

I may Just Be a HypoCrite

I Am a sorta athlete i will race and do triathlons and such but im a lazy person and i complain at pratice when i hurt i give up a bit and ive never really completly totally gotten into the mind set of a race or a sport. I dont write i love swimming on everything or decorate my room in water colors or a track, i dont even know where my race bike is, or do i wear race shirts everyday? nope. Yet im known well for my athletic skills erm i just hope no one is inspired by me.

Also i say i listen to all kinds of music and i do but i wont listen to some. But were all guilty of this one.

The judging theory too (guilty and dont you deny it)

Another thing i hate gooey relationships, well i think i do ugh i cant be in one they dont work for me whenever they do something i laugh b/c its riduculous. My entire family is made up of them too haha except me of course (recap) brother in an insanely serious relationship, parents in love since high school, sister just got married, even my grandma has a boyfriend!! but seriously (not kidding even .0001%) i dont have crushes anymore. Yeah i may think some boys are attractive but i usually dont persue them it would just ruin it. But i want a prince and a happily ever after yet i cant stand marrige but i want one. But i may want a relationship just not with anyone i presently know. (ha but my sister says im indepent and thats good) how would she know?

There is so many more maybe im a bit repeitive but were all boring honey if you havn't figured that out yet.

Your quickly not going to follow me anymore are you? Blogger

People Watching

People Watching. If you have never done this its just when your around a bunch of people you have never meet and you just kinda look at them, not really judging just being open minded. Whenever i go to big cities i cant help but do this its so facinating, like this weekend i noticed about 300 differnt types of people. Our social standings, happiness, wealth, and additudes shape out entire lives! Just by the way some people were walking i could tell their own self worth!
So you might have heard this saying "Our childhoods make us who we are as adults." Well...im pretty sure my siblings childhoods were THAT differnt then mine so Im not too sure. Our brains may have differnt reactions and siblings may have similiar qualities but i say that we just had simliar experiances of home life.
Back to people watching: The way people where there clothes you can tell too. If they had a tough night, really into fashion, searching for attention, a high school name brander, tired and comfy.
Thanks for reading (sorry for the bad gragmer and sepelling)
Mhhm i wonder what people think of me when they people watch?
Your, For now, Thoughtfull Blagga

ELECTIONSS

Okay so im very glad im not old enough to vote for elections this tuesday, i dont want to be to blame for whatever happens after this. It is our country, lets try and protect if even if we see our world crashing down us..pick the leader you believe will at least TRY to pick it up even if its w/knifes...
bloging sorta Jasmine Hopeful..

Pain = Happiness?

Okay so i must apologize, i hate writing about swimming to you guys b/c im beeting your not in it but it is pretty much my life right now (at least for the next to weeks). Anyways lately i have making it hurt trying really hard and my body wants against everything to just stop halfway in the pool and float along like a piece of driftwood but i guess my brain is a tiny bit more powerful and it keeps me going. But yes i have been trying super duper hard (and im just relizing a never really have before) and we had big nine today..and the outcome from this wonderfuly hard pain i have been feeling i dropped 1 second in my events..thats it!! Im a little upset.. but i am very happy just shooting for 2 less seconds to get my goal of high school :D..
- Sencccciirlly, Your hagard tired sore crybaby blogga

Fall leaves.

So it snowed today witch shouldnt happen..dont think i dont like it winter is my fav season but i love halloweeen and it shouldnt be ruined by some stupid snow littered everywhere. But hopefully it will be gone by tomarrow. Anyways i think its nuts that all the halloween costumes are turning really slutty ugh its sick im not wereing anything like that i will sow my own before i sink that low(p.s.i dont know how to sow). Like i was looking at the costumes and my age and costumes i actually fit into all end at mini skirt length!!! and this isnt just my body im only 5'4 so the makers of the outfits want to make me look like awhore. Luckly my family never throws anything away so i could throw some things together. Next year i will have to get a little boys XXL Costume
Your writer who will not be hoe instead a karate girl for halloween

Heroes

So this weekend i have mainly been watching heros (the t.v. show) and maybe after 15 hours (so far) of watching i have diluded myself to thinking this could actually happen. Maybe i have but if you really think about it the writers of this show tried to make this make sense. The idea of natural selection to make us have powers.. not to nuts, i mean from all we have evolved (if you believe) to add extra survival powers doesnt seem to outta the box. Though i dont think some of the powers would/could ever happen, and at first they probably wouldnt differ that much or even at all. Natural selection makes us, us ha :D
Crazy blogger at your service.

Yes, I wrote about the 70's

Okay so today two friends and i went to go skating which was pretty enjoyable better than sitting around at my house, but while we were balancing on the slick ice we were talking and we got to the topic of the time and the differences between our parents high school days and ours.

(inside note* im pretty sure i was born in the wrong era, 70's would have been perfect for me but w/e the dice didnt roll my way*) Todays teenagers usually meet through friends and communicate alot through technology(text and email) While our parents meet by hanging out and continuosly hanging out, witch i totally think would be way better! I mean you know the one/couple of people who only talk or say what they want through text but dont really talk in person(insane!)
but think if it was back in the day and they invited you to the rollerrink (haha) even though they cant skate i mean how much more fun would that have been then texting all night. Or they would go to rock concerts and yes we do that today but we would be way more likly to watch a movie with a couple friends.
Our decade is so outrageously boring its like the 50's all over again...but wait i guess i cannot say that because our crime rate is WAY to crazy for that,dude just get along and if that is so hard just ignore them i mean come on fighting does erm nothing just makes you madder and possibly hurt(think of your worried squirrly mom :O)
Oh one more thing the whole meeting your soulmate on the internet....sorry to break it to you but alot of people lie, plus they could be way ugly (eww), but i guess is does work so if ud like lol

I guess what im trying to say is instead of texting contstantly call em' up its more fun and maybe write an email but try to DO things with that person too not just make them fill the boring moment in your day

Peace out my fellow borring/texting era teenagers..

Youtube.

Wow This site has alot of sutff and i know people are going to be all like there are naughty things and stupid things i dont want my kids to see (aka its bad). But you know there going to have weird stupid stuff one day and just watch your dang kids if your that worried.

But I think this site is really pretty awesome! I have fallen in love with some vids. and just think its cool that you can be intertained and imformed but this site. Also its branched out the vidoe world so much! I have this friend and she loves to make videos and she posts them on the internet she gets to see what the people like and dont like, she loves it.

Its helped the music world to a lettle bit people get to watch music videos right from it (thats usually what i do) and then if ppl really like them they can buy the video.

Sorry this was kinda a weird post i just have a new hobby of watching videos off youtube
P.S. Watch fred hes pretty funny

Wonderful Outside

So I was outside today, I relized how beautful it is here. Like i always think ew albert lea is so gross and blah boring. But as i was driving around i was thinking its so colorful in the fall and we get to experiance all the seasons plus the glistening lakes *though i wouldnt really swim in some of them*Yeah spring a winter can be a bummer but we get to ski and snowboard and snowmobile and that pretty much makes up for the cold (at least to me). Also all the differnt fashions connected by the seasons ;). S
o if you havent been outside go out there maybe play in the leaves a bit and soak up the cooling breaze. Before its a biting wind.

2 years 2 months

Oh wow this is personal (just a warning).
this is ridulous but when i was 13 i thought i was deeply in love, maybe it was just my first boy or just that he was everything i had wanted. He was beautiful with blue eyes blonde hair, music nut (big bob marely fan), the way he talked with a bit of a british accent, or just the fact me made me feel wonderful inside out. We would constantly be in contact although we lived a hour apart. And we would never fight.
But of course it obviosly did end. What made me even think of him today was the song "stupid boy" by keith urban. And its kinda crazy b/c i dont even listen to country i just stumbled across this song and it made me well up so big i thought my chest would colapse.
Lets just say i was a foolish youngster but he will always be my first love. And i will not regret it one bit.

Beauty and the Loser??

What is it with all those movies were the nerdy guy wins the girl or all of a sudden the jock relizes he loves the shy girl in bio? And do you really think they have a happy ending? Mmm im not so sure i think there friends would clash, and i would be really akward at first but i guess thats what love is (and sorta akward).
But this totally wasnt the point of my blog today it was just a quick intro. What was really on my mind is personal apperiance, *i just murdered that word*, and how much it seems to make a differance in our society. I mean we all judge the girl with the huge ugly jacket with glasses, but what if its just a normal girl that just woke up didnt feel like putting her contacts in and grabbed her dads chaqueta. I bet people made fun of that she doesnt know and even guessed she was ugly without even seeing her up close.
See i have been on both sides of the pretty/ugly page (more the ugly) see like 8th and 9th grade i would barely look into fashion...*never have to this day been a name brand girl* anyways, i had really bad acne too and i didnt try to cover it up to much either. I am so embarrased by those days but its amazing how many people i was friends with were my friends and i dont know if they know, but im very grateful. but from my change (which was mainly just growing outta acne a bit, updating my wardrobe and growing my hair out), to now i have relized how people i dont know treat me sooooooo differnt i remember the day that a like 20 year old *very attractive* stranger actually hinted at flirting with me. It was in a pacsun and pretty much dreamy!! haha and i know he wouldnt even look at me twice if i hadnt let my hair down that morning. Which is terrible.
Society (this includes me and you) lets not try and be so vain!!!
P.S. Im not attractive at all so pleasse dont stawlk or look into what i said much

Why not? Well why yeah? I just dont know i guess

Okay I'm a person who will do pretty much anything as long as it agrees with my morals. Why not? The experiance is new things is fun and it gives a little added thrill to help. But at the same time i guess i wouldnt do anything...expesially when it deals with one of my closest friends. And it would (not just could..it would) impact that in at least differnt ways. Or lets say you used to do a certain thing alot then stopped..would you start it again even if it wasnt the same? I mean why not? but yet why would you say yes?
I'm sorry i can't explain this anymore but i dont want you reader to get wrapped up in my little teenage drama world. But just think about this sometime, your friend asks you if you would like to go to the football game and you say why not?-It would be fun and your not doing anything anyways. But why yes?- You know its probably going to rain and your friend is bringing a person you don't really get along with.
I dont want to sound like a party pooper person b/c i do usually say sure and i know there is pros and cons of everything but, I have been struggling with the question why not?for awhile now on one question and my pros and cons are split pretty dead even and even intertwined!!!

Chillin

So for a couple weeks i have been running around like a crazy monkey or something busy all the time. I was actually busy tonight too but i just couldn't do anymore i needed a day. a WHOLE day to just sit around read and rest, and yes i know i sound like a 45 year old women right there but as you know im not.I kinda feel like im the only person out of my age group that really needs days like this too. but i must not be.

But i kinda cheated ha i told my self if i was going to do this i wouldnt eat bad. but that seems to be my kriptonight i cant go a day without eating crap. I had LOADS of carbd then 2 pieices of french silk pie. Im pretty sure when my motabolism fades i will weigh just a light wieght of 700 pounds. I will be that overly large woman at the store geting even more food...

Anyways..I'm reading the famous twilight serious, im actually on new moon. Twilight took me a meer 3 days to read. Lets just say im in LOVE with edward, well at least my imagine of him. But imm sad because of new moons beginning i wont ruin it for anyone but it does get better so dont drop the book and cry and tear it to shreds because as i said it gets better. But i got it yesterday and im more then halfway. But really these books are a phomonone! Everyone has read them/wants to/waiting to get it/or is presently reading em'! wow props to the author stephenie you must be very happy (plus the money must be nice) but if you happen to come across this im very curious..Whats with the books cover pictures??? In the first one i was waiting forever for the apple to make any sense though the red contrasting against the black looks very nice.

sorry im starting to rable more and more...blah blah. Peace out and if u havent heard of the book consider it. Your relaxed blogger

-Jazzyfizzle

The Fam

Dude my family is so dissjointed (and yes i just said dude sorry if you dont like that word but i do :D). Just a tad of background in high school my fam was the following: dad, 70's partier kinda like hide in that 70's show glasses and all, my mom was the preppy *naughty word*no more needed to say, my sis was the punk rocker of the 90's with blue/pink/purple/white spiky hair, my brother is a gangsta in the black hoodie and im well me....ha you see this shouldnt even work together but it totally sorta does!

My dad and i are pretty much the same person but where obviously not plus he is such a sucker for my sister and i, my sister and i are so close its creepy, my mom is welll....and my bro just stays out of things for the most part. But its funny we usually dont sit down and eat together but if we did it would be completly bananas (as in crazy not really bananas. Another thing you know when your in the car and you usually can decide on a kinda even station for eveyone. Not with my family! we all freak out at whoever is turning that little knob saying "stop i like this song" or yelling "this music stinks!" luckily the help of ipods and mp3s has helped solve this delema

Ha that was just a little tinnie tiny nibble of a crust on a corner of a piece of bread at my direct fam. Just when your around them pretend you dont know this, my parents like to think we are very civil.

Homecoming

I told you i would write about homecoming when it was all done, well its all done ha. So homecomeing is pretty much a week full of school unity/spirit. I presonally have a hard time doing the homecomy stuff b/c im busy they like jam pack a ton of things into 5 days its crazy! but it is very fun, im one of those people who dresses up everyday, and 3 out of the 5 days i go all out.. if you dont just try it, its really fun and you think youll feel stupid but you dont. And then theres the sporting events mainly the football game and they put so much empashies on that game....my team dissapiontly lost at the very end it was dissapionting but really just being there is like the mainfun part not really the game :D. Sorry so short but i got morning practice ugh!!

Kemp (moo-moo)

okay so today im not quite sure what to write about, im sorry about the anger outburst the other day i was being orange(orange is diff. than green you accuse and are way to angry) with jealously. you know when your mom always says "they dont like you/make fun of you/ignore you because therye just jealous of how pretty/nice/natuarally athletic you are" Some times this is the most of truths statement. Oh! We are having homecoming this week but ill wright more about it when i can wright about the whole week, so after friday. mmm. i am going to tell you something sad so be prepared, i owned this cow right (kemp). Raised him after he was just born just two weeks, trained him to follow me around eat from, my hands. Well kemp was pretty dumb (cows brains arent very brillaint), but he did learn these things and licked me all the time, which was rather annoying actually. But as i was saying raised him from his calfhood till he was an adult, a goofy one. And today (im a terrible horrible person) was the day my kemp was shipped to the market. And please dont think of a person that doesnt care i told my friend and i started bawling then everyone kept asking me at school why i was crying ealiar then i would cry more im actually crying now, if you care. My little kemp is gone all because i sold him , im so glad there is a heaven, maybe he is the best pasture god can make.
I love you moo-moo and i hope you know, love mommy

Really?!?

So i spend my saturday at a swim meet. Which was fine I was doing alright matching my best times and whatnot. So i swim the race im best at (the 500) last, and I was working my but off i ending up getting third against some of the toughest, big, buff girls which i was glad with i worked my butt off. Just to find out im being demoted. A little background, I am/was the best from our town at the swim. And in our big nine i was seated 13th overall with the amazing ladies. But back to the story , I crawl outta the pool to overhear my coach telling another girl on our team that she is going to take my spot as first varsity. Just because the last 2 meets i havent won! I pretty much ran to my other teamates (not wanting to have my friend/new apperentice) see how saddened this made me. I am so disapionted at myself for being jealous and the fact that my coach did that. This girl could swim any event and they chose my race! The race we are doing fine in, getting second thirds and firsts!!! They just had to take this away from me one of the things i was proud to let everyone know, but hey im being demoted b/c i got third. i guess thats not good enough.

(A)mazingness of Music

Noise, vibrations to the eardrum. Thats all it really is. But thats totally not the whole picture. Music can make your whole day change it can make you stop and shout, dance, and make a fool of yourself. What makes a good song? I would say its when the instruments, vocals (of course) and lyrics all go together and most of all when a song has emotion! Some of my favorite songs are the ones that make me cry. Also just think of all the songs ever created, and they have at least one fan. Some people you never would guess have the favorite song as you and why? thats inexplainable but "your" song must relate to them which also connects you with them in some way (maybe the whole word could actually be connected by one song). I think its so crazy that these artists (the singers) are oh so famous yet they sing about the lowest they have been or not but we relate to their feelings.

So today I was being stressed out by life period so put some music on when i started my homework and it changed my prospective all around from that, to how glad i do all the things i do because of my passion for them. And i just had to write about it. thanks for reading

There must be some acid produced for happiness when we hear a song we like :P..Peace and add to the noise!!!